Tools & Tips

Scientifically Proven Recipe for Raising Your Spirits

The basic, scientifically proven recipe for raising our spirits appears to be deliciously straightforward: sex, exercise (other than sex), and service (other than…never mind). But for those times when your sweetheart and your running shoes are out of reach and your next volunteering gig is a few days off, uplift is also available in instant fun-size packets.
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Shortcuts to a Joyful Life with Leeza Gibbons

Michelle shares with Leeza Gibbons the tools and tricks you need to get the life you want on Leeza's radio show "Hollywood Confidential." Watch it here.
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Joyful Noise

Have you ever felt a sudden burst of energy after hearing your favorite song? A rush of positivity upon listening to some really good music? It doesn't matter whether you like Pink Floyd or Fergie, Mozart or Tim McGraw. Listening to your favorite music doesn't just relax you - it may actually help your heart! Great news, right!?

The same researchers who several years ago found that laughter has positive physical effects on the cardiovascular system recently turned their attention to music. They asked 10 people to choose songs that move them, as well as those that stress them out. The result: The subjects' blood vessels expanded and everage of 26 percent after listening to joyful music for 30 minutes, and narrowed 6 percent after hearing anziety provoking-tunes.

So crank up the tunes, baby! You can learn more about the study here.

(Photo: iStockphoto/Dan Wilton)

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45 Life Lessons


To celebrate growing older, a wise woman named Regina Brett wrote down 45 lessons life has taught her over the years. She just turned 90 years old and is a writer for The Plain Dealer, the largest newspaper in Ohio.

Check it out:

1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.
2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
4. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
5. Pay off your credit cards every month.
6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.
8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.
9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.
10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.

More after the jump.

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Natural Joyfulness in Difficult Times


A friend of mine, Skyler, recently returned from a trip to Malawi, a small country located in southeast Africa. With nearly one million people living with HIV/AIDS and nearly half of the population struggling to live on less than $1 a day, the conditions in Malawi COULD suck, but the Malawi people seem to have a natural joyfulness that carries them through difficult times, as evidenced by Sky's beautiful photos of Malawi children.

Sky's trip was for an organization called BuildOn, a non-profit that builds schools and brings literacy to children and adults in developing countries. You can watch the Today Show segment that highlights BuildOn's work in Malawi after the jump. Such a powerful reminder for each of us to be in service to others!
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Joy is the New Revolution!


Well, it's official. My mission to get one million people to experience more joy in their lives is really taking off, guerrilla style. No, it wasn't me who wrote "JOY IS THE NEW REVOLUTION" on a bathroom stall with a sharpie (see photo). My beautiful and talented daughter found this message at a local bar in Portland. Here's her story:

"I saw this quote in the restroom at the speakeasy in Portland, Oregon. I always find that, in public restrooms, my eye drifts across all of the drunken quips, shout-outs, and professions of love. I try and take in as much as possible in the 30 seconds I'm in there, but this time was different. Before i even sat down, this quote caught my attention. I even got a little excited! I couldn't believe that someone was rallying for *gasp* JOY instead of guerrilla warfare or simply no revolution at all. The message of peaceful protest and rally for good really resonates with me, so I decided to spend a few extra seconds and snap a photo!"

Thanks, Babo! And thanks to the joyful soul who carries around a sharpie so they can spread the joy message everywhere they go!

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Captain Sullenberger and his Vulcan mind powers

Listen to the air traffic recording of US Airways Flight 1549 that crashed into the Hudson River in New York on January 15 (all 155 passengers and crew survived). The plane lost power in both engines after a bird attack by a gaggle of geese. Air traffic control informs Captain Chesley B. "Sully" Sullenberger III of nearby airports with open runways where he can land the disabled aircraft. Not knowing if the plane will make it to the airport in New Jersey or if it will crash in the Bronx, Capt. Sullenberger calmly and temperately radios back with, "We're gonna be in the Hudson."

Unlike what you'd expect to hear in the movies, when the pilot and co-pilots are shrieking coordinates into the radio, Capt. Sullenberger is totally calm. Cool as a cucumber.

Even though the recording lacks the drama and excitement you'd expect, it is fascinating to hear his calm, rational decision-making as he narrows down the options for where to land his aircraft.

How'd he do that?!? What allows some people to remain calm under extreme pressure?

LA Times Columnist Jonah Lehrer helped me clear this up. He says that in recent years, neuroscientists have been able to see what happens inside the brain when people, like Sullenberger, are forced to make decisions under pressure. A typical assumption is that some people just don't feel fear. But that's not the case. Our brains trigger fear circuits, such as the amygdala, automatically. It is likely that everyone on Flight 1549 was terrified.

So what's the trick?
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Another Happiness Test

Because happiness, joy, and the quest to live the best life possible is my thing, you can understand my excitement over a new branch of psychology that focuses on positive emotions, understanding how they work, and how to re-create them. It's called positive psychology (and is a marked departure from traditional psychology's focus on the negative aspects of human consciousness, such as phobias and disorders.)

Claremont Graduate University in Claremont, CA is the first educational institution to offer a PhD in positive psychology. Dr. Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi (pronounced CHICK-sent-me-high-ee) heads the program, which stresses serious research and development of methods that institutions can use to enrich the lives of patients and individuals. Dr. Csikszentmihalyi says the program is aimed at collecting data and conceptualizing new ideas that will add meaning, excitement and enthusiasm to the human experience.

One of my colleagues, an executive coach and consultant here in Los Angeles, Libby Gill, was able to speak to Dr. Csikszentmihalyi and get a do-it-yourself version of one of his research techniques used to measure the level of happiness or life satisfaction in subjects.
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"I wanna get people LIVING every day."

Listen to my chat with Fox News Radio's Melanie Lyons about why I wrote my book, Get a Life That Doesn't Suck.




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Experiences make us happier than possessions

We're all familiar with the adage that says money can't buy happiness, but if you're going to spend some money, WHAT you buy may affect your level of satisfaction.

According to a new study, the initial thrill of buying something new - a new car or a new pair of suede boots - fades over time (about six to eight weeks after the purchase), whereas experiences continue to provide happy feelings long after the event occurred.

Ryan Howell, assistant professor of psychology at San Francisco State University, conducted a study that asked participants about recent purchases that they intentionally made in order to make themselves happy. The study found that while most people were generally happy with their purchases no matter what it was, those who made purchases that involved experiences (ie. a weekend trip or concert tickets) tended to show a higher level of satisfaction at the time and after the experience had passed.

How can this be?! (I LOVE my Prada backpack! Kidding, kidding.) Mr. Howell observed that experiences, unlike purchases, led to a sense of relatedness to others - getting closer to friends and family. Buying an extra movie ticket for your friend allows you to fulfill the human need for social bonding while having the experience yourself. Another reason for increased happiness in experiences was that people felt a greater sense of vitality or "being alive" during the experience and in reflection. Howell comments that while a new computer is nice, it isn't going to make you feel more alive.

In these tough economic times, where many of us have little extra money, perhaps this new information will change the way in which we choose to spend our money (and our time). To learn more about Mr. Howell's study, read the entire article here.

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The Happiest Place on Earth

In 2006 researchers at the New Economics Foundation and Friends of the Earth created a new measure of human happiness that shows which countries lead the world in promoting satisfaction. And the winner is not who you'd expect: Vanuatu, a string of islands in the Pacific. Second place? Colombia (another surprise since Colombia is a country known for bloody terrorists and cocaine traffickers.) The reason the small island country of Vanuatu is at the top is for a couple important reasons: life expectancy is long and close to that of Western nations, strong democratic traditions exist, there is careful conservation of natural resources, and a general high degree of well-being is reported by its citizens. The research also revealed that the world's leading economic powers fared only so-so in the rankings. One thing that was common in wealthy countries was a high level of alienation reported by citizens. More significant was the measure of wealthy countries ecological footprint, which put countries like Japan, the UK, Canada, Russia, and the US at the bottom of the happy list.

For more information on world happiness rankings:
http://worlddatabaseofhappiness.eur.nl/
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The last career guide you'll ever need: a Japanese comic book

I've read the gamut of career manuals in my day and in each one I found unique and valuable nuggets of advice, yet they all seemed to recommend the same general tips and guidelines: what questions to ask in an interview, impress your boss by taking notes, how to get promoted, etc. A few months ago, I came across a new book in the business and career genre that offered something different: Unlike most career manuals, this book won't teach you how to write a great resume (the author points out that's what Google is for!) This book does, however, give strategic advice that you won’t find anywhere else – the sort of tough and inspiring truths people wish they’d known when they were starting out in the workforce.
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Why kindness makes psychologists nervous.

In an Ode Magazine article from November 2007, David Servan-Schreiber reflects on how kindness does not always get high marks in psychotherapy. He says "kindness" is regarded as "too soft" by his colleagues (psychiatrists and psychologists). They prefer "benevolent neutrality." But the kindness that Servan-Schreiber is talking about is demonstrated with simple things, like handing over a box of tissues, speaking to a patient gently and reassuringly, or simply staying by their side for a little longer - things that require a certain tenderness and compassion that cannot be accomplished with an approach of "benevolent neutrality." He brings up an extremely valid point: Kindness is, all by itself, a powerful therapeutic tool - especially in everyday relationships.
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Your Thoughts DO Affect Your Life!

For all you analytical types out there, you can now learn the science and physiology behind feeling good and what gets in the way of feeling good (ie. stress) from the comfort of your pajamas and bunny slippers. AND you can actually see (with a handy little device) how your thoughts and emotions effect your heart and nervous system! The Institute of HeartMath has researched heart/brain communication, stress and emotional management for over a decade and applied its findings to practical, easy-to-use tools that have been scientifically developed and tested. HeartMath's products use the intelligence of the heart in concert with the mind to improve health, performance, relationships and well-being at home and in the workplace. Cool stuff.  more »

Hooray! One More Reason to Eat Chocolate!

Research shows that Intentional Chocolate™ significantly decreases stress, increases calmness, and lessens fatigue in those who eat it.

Based in Los Angeles and Northern California, Intentional Chocolate gives you the sweet stuff with a twist: its products are clinically proven to give you more energy & vigour, plus a heightened state of well-being, thanks to blessings from Buddhist monks.

Intentional Chocolate put Dalai Lama-approved senior priests in a room with chocolates from its parent company, Hawaiian Vintage (once called "the best chocolate in the world" by the NY Times, who love snacking), and had them intone "An individual who consumes this chocolate will manifest optimal health and functioning at physical, emotional, and mental levels, and in particular will enjoy an increased sense of energy, vigour, and well-being" before meditating on the phrase for 20 minutes.

In a peer-reviewed, double-blind study, eating one ounce of their chocolate a day was found to increase these goals by up to 1000% (heightened states of waistline went unreported).

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Merely Anticipating a Laugh Reduces Stress Hormones

A New Study Shows that Anticipating a Laugh or Humorous Experience Reduces Stress Hormones.

(ScienceDaily April 2008) In 2006 researchers investigating the interaction between the brain, behavior, and the immune system found that simply anticipating a mirthful laughter experience boosted health-protecting hormones. Now, two years later, the same researchers have found that the anticipation of a positive humorous laughter experience also reduces potentially detrimental stress hormones.
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How to Get Out of a Bad Mood in 3 Easy Steps

You know that feeling when you're stuck in a cranky mood and can't shake it, no matter how many Hershey Kisses or deep breathes you take? People frequently ask me, "What's the best way to get out of a bad mood?" 

Well, I could be a smartass and say, "Decide to," but I'm pretty sure they're looking for more than that. I have a surefire cure. Do these three things. Watch now.

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Easy Ways to Reduce Stress

Stressssssss. It's yucky. And all of us experience it at one point or another.  If you are on an emotional roller coaster, have frequent colds or illnesses, exhaustion, inability to sleep, extreme worry, or even poor memory, you are suffering from stress. The good news: There are many things you can do to manage stress. Watch now.
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How to Avoid Negative Thoughts

One of the biggest secrets to Getting A Life That Doesn't Suck is being conscious of the fact that your thoughts affect your life. (There is scientific evidence out there that proves this.) Your brain hears everything you think and what you focus on gets bigger. You can change what you attract to yourself by changing your thoughts, feelings, and actions.

So how do you keep those pesky negative thoughts from sneaking up on you? Check out this easy trick. Watch now.

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How to Get a Life That Doesn't Suck when Everything Sucks!

Everything sucks! In these uncertain times (recession, layoffs, foreclosures, etc.) it sure does seem like everything sucks right now. It ain't easy, but even from within the most trying of circumstances, it is still possible to Get a Life That Doesn't Suck. These simple tips can help show you how. Watch now.
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Your Thoughts Affect Your Life - Why Thinking Good Thoughts is Important

Science has shown that your thoughts cause your emotions, which cause your actions. Change your thoughts and you can change how you think and behave, even if the situation itself doesn't change. So if you want to be happier, get the promotion, lose 10 pounds, deal with cranky co-workers, the best place to start is with your thoughts. But how, exactly, do you do that? Watch to find out.
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